I am SOOO excited...I got my first paycheck today with the "Make Work Pay" credit in it. How much will I get, ooh ooh, I can't wait to tear open that envelope. (tear, rip, shuffle)
Hang on, I thought we were supposed to get some extra money! Let's look a little closer- compare it to last couple of weeks checks...
Hey there it is! $10.23! Ten dollars and 23 cents. TEN DOLLARS AND TWENTY THREE CENTS!! What good is TEN BUCKS going to do for stimulating the economy? TEN bucks is equivalent to 25 cents an hour!
Barack, what makes you think that TEN DOLLARS a week is going to help me in this tight economy?
This soooo disappointing. Ten freaking bucks. What will I ever spend it on? (rolls eyes) Not enough to buy a car, not enough to fill up my gas tank, not enough to make a minimum credit card payment, and not enough to even pay the paper boy.
$10. Hmm, what can you get for ten bucks?
9 items from the Dollar Store. (don't forget sales tax!)
A really expensive coconut.
40 gumballs.
Couple gallons of gas and a soda.
Half of a lap dance.
High cholesterol, if you spend it on the Value Menu at McDonald's.
Cheap beer.
Rent a couple of movies.
Oh well. I'm gonna have think long and hard how I'm going to spend this windfall.
10 bucks...well it is ten more dollars than I had before. Yeah that's it!! I have $10 dollars more this week than I had last week! That $10 may just come in handy...
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Obama's Stimulus Package
Are you one of the people who don't think the stimulus package is needed? Were things going just fine for you, or you don't think the Government should get involved with such economic issues? Or do you just want the entire country to fall to it's knees?
If you are one of those folks, Rejoice! I have the perfect plan for you so you can keep your concience clear and not appear in any way to support the Obama Stimulus Plan.
All you have to do is say NO! When you receive the benefit of tax cuts in your paycheck, send that money back to the Government! When you file your taxes, say NO THANKS when itemizing those deductions. Refuse to do business with any company (including your own employer) that receives tax incentives or funds from the Government. Don't file a claim for Unemployment if you lose your job! Don't drive on roads repaired because of Goverment programs, and certainly don't buy American automobiles or parts! Take your children out of those socialist public schools! Stop house-hunting because I hear there are tax credits for buying homes, and the banks also took bailout money.
By following these few simple rules, you can keep your head high and proudly say "I'm an Idiot!" while everyone else is working to improve our economic crisis; while you stand around and let the world go on by.
Wake up and smell the coffee- any help is better than none. The stimulus may not be perfect, but it's better than anything else that's been proposed. I will gratefully accept the benefits of the stimulus plan, and hope for a better tomorrow.
If you are one of those folks, Rejoice! I have the perfect plan for you so you can keep your concience clear and not appear in any way to support the Obama Stimulus Plan.
All you have to do is say NO! When you receive the benefit of tax cuts in your paycheck, send that money back to the Government! When you file your taxes, say NO THANKS when itemizing those deductions. Refuse to do business with any company (including your own employer) that receives tax incentives or funds from the Government. Don't file a claim for Unemployment if you lose your job! Don't drive on roads repaired because of Goverment programs, and certainly don't buy American automobiles or parts! Take your children out of those socialist public schools! Stop house-hunting because I hear there are tax credits for buying homes, and the banks also took bailout money.
By following these few simple rules, you can keep your head high and proudly say "I'm an Idiot!" while everyone else is working to improve our economic crisis; while you stand around and let the world go on by.
Wake up and smell the coffee- any help is better than none. The stimulus may not be perfect, but it's better than anything else that's been proposed. I will gratefully accept the benefits of the stimulus plan, and hope for a better tomorrow.
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